Life As I See It.

After almost completely ignoring this blog for a year i decided it was time to post once again. Sorry for the delay. Life got busy.

Lately i have found myself thinking about who i am. Its a question i ask myself often. So much in my life has changed in the past 365 days that it makes finding an answer next to impossible. In the past year alone i joined the airforce, went through more relationships than the other eighteen years combined, gotten three tattoos, and grown physically and emotionally. On july sixth of 2009 i was just some punk eighteen year old kid about to embark on the journey of a lifetime. I was immature in so many ways. I thought that a girlfriend of six months was my biggest priority in life. I thought that i had all the answers. I believed that i was the biggest and baddest motherfucker god ever placed on the earth. On july seventh at zero three hundred all that changed. In the eight weeks of basic military training I learned that i knew nothing, that i was just a cog in the machine that makes the military go round. I learned that some punk ass eighteen year old kid with hippie long hair had no place in this world but as a wal-mart bagboy. I grew up in those eight weeks. I lost that youthfull innocence. Every day i had it pounded in my head that i was no longer a child and that it was my time to become a man. I left the 326th training squadron with my head held high and the drive to be the best airman there ever was.  And then the next i rolled up to the 344trs and my world was rocked once again. After eight weeks of not having any freedom. Not having the ability to urinate without standing at attention and asking permission we were suddenly let free upon the world. I went wild with my new found freedom. I partied hard, did my fair share of whoring it up, got my first tattoo, and got right back into the habit of smoking and chewing. Unfortuntilly when i left the 344th i didnt leave my mindset with me. I showed up to cheyenne wyoming with dexter and walked off that plane with no idea of what i had just signed up for. Wyoming was in the middle of a blizzard that weekend so dexter and i holed up in the dorms until monday when we had to report to our duty stations. My first day at work i felt so lost. it was almost as if i had learned nothing in tech school at all. But being the quick learner that i am i put my whole heart into becoming a good airman. That did not last so long. I got bored and fell back into the game of chasing women. This lasted for a few months. I then met katie and fell hard. I guess i am just attracted to crazy women or something. That relationship lasted barely three months. After it ended and she deployed i was lost i fell right back into the party scene. I was at the lowest point of my life until about two months ago. I discovered the gym and fell in love with it. It became my new passion. I met my new twp best friends watts and logan. They keep me out of trouble and occupied. I am learning more and more about myself each day. I still have not completely found myself but im gettin there. And everyday im closer to a answer.